The Freedom of Less

       Throughout my life it seems I've always carried excess baggage: HUGE purse filled with all those "just in case" necessities, the biggest suitcase AND carry-on allowed on the plane, "sentimental stuff" tucked into any nook and cranny in my attic. I've just realized, though, that chronic illness has suddenly changed all that. I carry the smallest purse possible, and my list of necessities has shrunk to almost nothing. Though I'm not really traveling, when I pack for a few days at the lake, I find each trip I carry less and less with me. I've learned what I can get by with, or more importantly WITHOUT. I find myself thinking more about cleaning out closets than about shopping for new clothes or shoes, about what I can give away rather than acquire. But slowly, slowly, I'm beginning to accept, and even embrace the freedom of less. I can survive and even grow stronger on less elaborate meals, keep my body covered with LOTS fewer changes of clothes, and most importantly grow closer to God with less "activity."   

      I'm realizing of late that what I've really let go of are all the "shoulds." I've pretty much always been motivated by what I thought I "should" be "doing." I've come to realize, however, that these were expectations I put on myself rather than anyone else's expectations of me. Just as I can't earn my salvation by any works, I can't earn any human being's love by doing more for them. Not that it's not rewarding to sacrifice for someone else, but it is not the sacrifice that makes another person love me, but rather who I am. And you know what? That hasn't changed just because of my circumstances. I am still the Charlanne my Heavenly Father "Knit together in my mother's womb,.... made in secret,... formed in the depths of the earth."  (Psalm 139:13,15 CSB) He loves me no matter what I do or don't do!

     And you know what? By "doing" less I have MORE: time to write a note of encouragement or make a phone call of concern, money to give to help others, time to enjoy the beauty of the world that's right around me (a sunset, a moonrise, a tree swaying in the breeze, blossoms emerging in Spring), time to spend quietly with my Lord and Savior, studying His Word, simply adoring Him and reveling in His love for me.

     Our new pup, Copper, just gave us the perfect illustration this morning: when Bill opened the bedroom door and came into the living room where Copper was sleeping, without even opening his eyes, Copper began to wag his tail (his love language). Bill was creeping quietly so as not to disturb him, not turning on any lights or making a sound, yet his mere presence made that sweet dog happy. Friend, that's all we have to do to please God-- open the door and receive His love, poured out freely, at no cost to us, then delight in His delight in us! 

 “Consider how the wildflowers grow: They don’t labor or spin thread. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was adorned like one of these."  Luke 12:27 CSB)

Happy at his master's feet!

P.S. This Jason Crabb song expresses it beautifully-- enjoy! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdstMOPLnbY

 "He must increase, but I must decrease"  (John 3:30)

♱

 

He Knew!

    

       "Lord, You have searched me and known me.  You know when I sit down and when I stand up;  You understand my thoughts from far away.  You observe my travels and my rest;  You are aware of all my ways.  Before a word is on my tongue, You know all about it, Lord.  You have encircled me; You have placed your hand on me. This wondrous knowledge is beyond me.  It is lofty;  I am unable to reach it.... Your eyes saw me when I was formless; all my days were written in your book and planned before a single one of them began."   (Psalm 139:1-6, 16 CSB)

      As I sit with my toes dipped in the mighty ocean, I consider this favorite Psalm of mine and it takes my breath away! This goal I've had, to sometime get back to the beach and walk to the shoreline under my own strength-- my Father knew before I was even born, not just that I would have this illness and this dream, but the exact day and time I would achieve my goal. 

      And then I think "Silly girl! How can you even imagine you got here "under your own steam"? I am quickly humbled to acknowledge all the power behind my "steam": Bill, Dr. K., Dr. P., Doc S, Annie Hopper's "Retraining the Brain," the countless prayers offered by so many loved ones (probably even more than I know!), not to mention love & support in more ways than I can name. And there, over, under, alongside, and through all those precious instruments, the grace of my Great God and loving Father.

      Let that sink in a moment. Those verses apply to you as much as to me. They applied to me long before I ever acknowledged them. Like it or not, accept it or not, the God Who created you knows everything you've done and ever will do! Oh, He's not manipulating you like a puppet-- He just knows His creation like we can't even comprehend, better than we know ourselves. 

      How often have you longed to be known, really deeply known, by maybe just one other person? I know I wanted that for much of my life, until I realized I HAVE it, you have it, we all have it! And the One Who knows us better than our parents, spouse, best friend is the One Who has ALL knowledge about EVERYTHING! And not only that, He has all wisdom, and He wants to be our Guide, our Counselor, our Comforter through His Holy Spirit, the Paraclete (in Greek, literally advocate).

      Oh my friend, wherever you are this moment, whatever you're going through right now, stop and drink in that truth-- God knows. Take comfort and smile. That's what I'm doing! 

      

Giving Up My Idols

My Filthy Rags

 

     I used to enjoy watching "American Idol" on television, although I always said, "I just don't like the term "Idol." Pretty short-sighted of me, when I was surrounding myself with my own idols of various sorts: my "To Do" list, material things, knowledge, beauty, the joy of entertaining in my home, recognition for my own accomplishments, even the "good things" I did at church. Probably the first three years of chronic illness I idolized health and physical ability, spending a huge percentage of my time trying to figure out what was wrong with me and how I could get over it. (I am definitely NOT saying striving for health, purpose, doing good, or loving others are bad things, but making health and strength the be-all and end-all of my existence was anything BUT healthy!) In itself, each of these things (and you can think of more) is not a bad goal. But it's when any one or combination of them becomes an obsession that we're in trouble. Dictionary.com defines an obsession this way: "the domination of one's thoughts or feelings by a persistent idea, image, desire, etc." (emphasis mine).

      Believe me, from the beginning of this journey, I have had friends, family, and doctors who constantly tried to point me in the right direction, through persistent prayers, encouraging cards, texts, conversations, any way possible to give me hope. I've accepted and appreciated every one. Yet yesterday, after nearly four years, I was able to say honestly to a dear and faithful friend, "I am FINALLY truly able to thank God not only for the good days or even hours, but also for the pain, because I have grown so much closer to HIM, most of all in the painful days, the days when I had nothing left but Him!" I used to think, "What good am I? What is this accomplishing?" But slowly I realized that throughout my life accomplishment had become my idol and pride my greatest sin.

 As the prophet Isaiah put it, 

"All of us have become like one who is unclean,

    and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags;

we all shrivel up like a leaf,

    and like the wind our sins sweep us away."

(Isaiah 64:6 NIV)

      I just read in today's entry in Streams in the Desert about someone observing the inner workings of a trolley's power plant. The observer asked, "How do they make the power?" The answer: " ...by the revolution of those wheels and the friction they produce. The rubbing creates the electric current." Oh my! I feel the current of God rushing through my body, mind, and soul even as I type the words! Through this friction of pain and disability He has made me ever more aware of His constant presence within and beside me as I have never before experienced it! And so, with the apostle Paul, I say,

       "[F]or this reason, to keep me from exalting myself, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to torment me—to keep me from exalting myself! Concerning this I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might leave me. And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in distresses, in persecutions, in difficulties, in behalf of Christ; for when I am weak, then I am strong."   (2 Corinthians 12:7-10 NASB)

And with the Psalmist, 

"I sing to God, the Praise-Lofty, and find myself safe and saved." (Psalm 18:3 Msg)

 "He must increase, but I must decrease"  (John 3:30)

♱

Good Friday

   

  I look out at the river flowing by and see the water flowing from His pierced side. For you, for me. It's a sunny day here, but at that moment darkness covered the earth, because evil was still trying hard to win out. 

      "I thirst," He had said. Ironic, those words coming from the lips of the Living Water. But He had to take the bitter herbs offered to Him for us, after the pain of all those lashes, to drink to the dregs the punishment we all deserve and in His purity He didn't. And then it was finished, the price of sin paid for all time.

      But just to make sure, the soldier pierced His side, and out flowed that river of living water promised to the woman at the well, that "well of water springing up ... for eternal life." Mingled with the blood of the perfect Passover Lamb, it left His flawless side to spring up in our flawed selves. 

       What will we do with it? Our eternity depends on that one choice! ✝️ 

      "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth on Him should not perish, but have everlasting life." John 3:16

The Gift of Love

       

A lap full of love.

   

      I awoke at 3 A.M. with burning flesh, rose, and went to my place of comfort -- my recliner in the living room. I looked toward the picture window to find the star which always resides somewhere near the upper right corner during these hours. Sometimes it sparkles like a diamond when the sky is blackest; sometimes it's muted by a veil of fog; sometimes it's totally obscured by thick clouds. I thought, "How like God's presence, shining in my life in varying degrees, depending on how clear the atmosphere is!" And then I thought, "But I know He always loves me."  I know it with my head if I don't always feel it with my heart. But whose fault is that?

      And then my hand unconsciously reached for the soft creature beside me. Copper seems always to lean into my touch, as if reveling in it. Our previous dog, Poppy, was aloof as a cat can be. Bill and I both loved her dearly, and tried showing her by not only taking care of her needs, but with caresses and soft words, too. Her response, however, was usually to turn away or even growl, or worst, get up and walk away. As much as we loved that dog, we had no idea what we were missing until Copper came along and actually enjoyed our affection. This 70-pound "cream puff" as Bill has aptly dubbed him, thinks nothing of taking a running leap onto our laps to bestow kisses and nuzzles on the lucky recipient. He loves to be petted, cuddled, talked to as if he is understanding every gooey word, and he returns our acts of affection with moans, wallows of delight, and his own "goo-goo eyes"! 

      Then I began to think of people I love, and I realized something: there are people I truly have loved and admired, yet no matter how much I poured my love into them there's an invisible wall they've thrown up that won't let them RECEIVE the fulness of my feelings. I can do nothing to tear down this wall, and so they are perhaps missing the full blessing of being loved, as I am missing the blessing of having my love received. Notice I didn't say "returned." I'm not sure you could say Copper actually gives us love. His gift to us is receiving our love!

      I am beginning to realize that, conversely, there have been people in my life who tried to give me love, and I was the one building walls and refusing that love. I wonder what amazing relationships I may have missed out on by rejecting someone's love, freely given, nothing required in return? And did they miss my receiving of their gift? I wonder how God feels when so many of His children simply refuse the love He so freely offers, asking nothing in return? Think about it: how do you feel when you pour love into another and it doesn't seem even to be noticed, like the proverbial water off a duck's back?

      Oh my friend, consider this: God, Creator of the Universe, has absolutely everything He needs! The whole creation is His! He doesn't need us; He just loves us! He created us for fellowship, communion with Him-- that's all! I've always liked the Greek koinonia because it incorporates the broad scope of the concept of fellowship. According to biblestudytools.com,

"the nature of koinonia... depicts an interactive relationship between God and believers who are sharing new life through Christ. The Greek word captures the entirety of this relationship. It involves active participation in Christian community: sharing in spiritual blessings and giving material blessings." (emphasis mine)

      Saturday, March 27, 2021, is the beginning of Passover, the commemoration of the time the captive Jews were spared from slavery and death in Egypt by the blood of a lamb spread over their doorposts. The culmination of this week of fasting and feasting is Sunday, April 4, Easter Sunday, or more appropriately Resurrection Sunday, which marks the day the ultimate Passover Lamb conquered death for us all for all time by rising from His grave to take His rightful place at the right hand of God the Father. It was Our Father's ultimate gift of love. Will we delight Him by accepting it?

  "We proclaim to you what we have seen and heard, so that you also may have fellowship with us. And our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son, Jesus Christ. 

We write this to make our joy complete.

 This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. 

If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. 

But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin." (1 John 1:3-7 NIV)

"He must increase, but I must decrease"  (John 3:30) ♱ IMPORTANT: If you have never accepted the gift of God's love, don't wait another minute, because we aren't guaranteed the next breath. Pray this prayer: Dear Lord, I know that I am a sinner, no matter how "good" I might appear. I could never be perfect enough to spend eternity in Your Holy Presence, no matter how hard I try. I know that the only way I will spend eternity with You is through the blood of Messiah Jesus, the only Perfect Lamb and Your only Son. I ask you now to forgive my every sin and help me turn away from all unrighteousness so that from this moment on I will live for You and by Your grace. Now by the presence of Your Holy Spirit in me, help me to live according to Your will, filled with Your light and love, growing closer to You every day by studying Your Word and fellowshipping with other believers.                                       In the name of Jesus my Savior,                                                         Amen If you just prayed this prayer in sincerity, there's a celebration happening in Heaven right now in your honor! Go and share the news with a pastor or friend, or message me, so others can share in the celebration and pray for you as you begin the most exciting adventure of your life!

 

Morning Grace

     

       I love to watch morning arrive, especially in winter. It sneaks in almost unnoticed, as stars slowly give up their brilliance, and just as gently the silhouettes of naked trees appear like silent ink-strokes of the Master Artist against the slowly bluing sky. The day comes in gradually, not like a lightning flash harsh and shattering, until the moment when I realize the world is once again visible, rest is over, and activity begins. 

      In every season the river birch outside my front window is as graceful as a prima ballerina, but somehow it's more striking when it's stripped bare of its soft green leaves. Isn't that the way of with life? When we've been stripped bare of all the frills we add without thinking-- endless activity requiring a varied wardrobe, gallons of fuel, countless hours spent running to and fro, attention to appearances for what?-- maybe that's when grace shows up, silently and without flourish. Maybe that's when we truly get to know ourselves and our Maker, discover our purpose.

      That's certainly how grace dawns on me. I know it's been there all along, like the tree branches that didn't disappear at night just because I couldn't see them. God's unmerited favor has been there for you and for me since the beginning of time. He ordained it for all of us, all humankind whom He created simply to have fellowship with Him. ["Then God said, 'Let us make man in our image, according to our likeness.'" Genesis 1:26 CSB]

      Why that perfect fellowship wasn't enough for Adam and Eve I'll never understand, but I certainly experience the consequences of their poor choice by continuing in my own rebellious nature. How can I be so blind to His grace, which is so obvious every day in my life? I have no idea. It begins just two verses later: "God blessed them...."  [Genesis 1:28 CSB] Like the tree which does nothing on its own to "deserve" to be there and give beauty and shade to all who gaze on it, grace is not something I can earn. God sends the sunshine and rain on the tree, even though it can't get up and walk around "doing something" to earn what it needs for its very existence. 

      At this late stage in life, I think I am truly coming to grasp just how great is God's grace to give me each new day simply to enjoy this beautiful but broken world and even more importantly to fellowship with Him. I know I will have eternity to experience an even closer walk with Him, but my eternity will be richer for each day I'm allowed to walk this miraculous planet with my fellow creatures. Let us never forget that this Lenten season commemorates God's greatest display of His grace to us: He came to this earth which He created perfect in every way but which we broke with our sin; He gave up His heavenly home to become a frail human like us and have His body broken by our sin, then died in the cruelest way possible, the perfect sacrifice for ALL our sins. But the story doesn't end there: after three days in the grave He rose again so that we could join Him as originally intended, in perfect fellowship for eternity!

"He was in the world, and the world was created through Him, and yet the world did not recognize Him. He came to His own, and His own people did not receive Him. But to all who did receive Him, He gave them the right to be children of God, to those who believe in His name...." [John 1:10-12 CSB]

      I pray that everyone reading this has accepted that gift, turned away from sin, and is living in that unfathomable grace. If not, may today be the day, because I want to meet you all at our Savior's feet! 💗

NOTE: During this Lenten season, and simply to learn more about Jesus and feel closer to Him, I highly recommend reading the Gospel of John, written by the one called "the beloved disciple," who was closer to Jesus than a brother.

 "He must increase, but I must decrease"  (John 3:30)

♱

Making Rainbows

       

      There's a crystal ball (not the fortune-telling kind!) hanging in the bay window at the lake. I think I gave it to my mother after purchasing it on one of my first trips to St.Thomas, so it's probably hung there 30 years or so. I love sitting in my comfy chair in the morning, drinking my coffee and spending time with God, and on sunny days watching the rainbows appear in the room around me, on floor, walls, furniture. But last week I happened to look up and notice them splayed across the ceiling. I've delighted in them often, but after a string of cloudy days their brightness struck me especially, as they seemed to shimmer with a light of their own. Of course I knew the source of their light was over my shoulder, and so brilliant that I shouldn't look at it directly, but I began thinking about what it took to make those rainbows. In fact, just about then a cloud passing between the source and the crystal momentarily made the rainbows fade. They reappeared after the cloud passed, but eventually, the sun rose so high that the rainbows disappeared until the next day when the sun shone through the crystal again.

      I took down the crystal and began to examine it and think about just what it took to make those little rainbows I enjoyed so much. Crystals form from a combination of heat and pressure acting on naturally-occurring chemicals in the earth. Then they are mined, just like diamonds (which are really a particular type of crystal). They are often left natural for use in healing or ornamentation, but my crystal ball had been precisely cut and polished (like a diamond) to give it the many facets which produced the rainbows I was enjoying. This crystal had been through a lot in order to give me so much pleasure!

      How like God to teach us such a lesson in the things we often take for granted! When I think of the people who have shone brightest in my life, I know that their brightness came at a cost. 

      (1) Like that crystal heated and pressed in the earth, then cut and polished by a master gemologist, the pressure of adversity makes us resilient.

      (2) The cutting away of all that's not beautiful by the Master Creator of us all, painful though it may be, makes us send out His brilliance in a myriad of colors upon all we encounter. 

      (3) The higher the position of the Son in our lives, the more brilliantly we shine, until He reaches His apex and shines so brilliantly there's no need for rainbows, because the Source is our focus.

"For we are not proclaiming ourselves but Jesus Christ as Lord, and ourselves as your servants for Jesus’ sake. For God who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of God’s glory in the face of Jesus Christ. Now we have this treasure in clay jars, so that this extraordinary power may be from God and not from us. We are afflicted in every way but not crushed; we are perplexed but not in despair; we are persecuted but not abandoned; we are struck down but not destroyed. We always carry the death of Jesus in our body, so that the life of Jesus may also be displayed in our body. For we who live are always being given over to death for Jesus’s sake, so that Jesus’s life may also be displayed in our mortal flesh. So then, death is at work in us, but life in you. And since we have the same spirit of faith in keeping with what is written, I believed, therefore I spoke, we also believe, and therefore speak. For we know that the one who raised the Lord Jesus will also raise us with Jesus and present us with you. Indeed, everything is for your benefit so that, as grace extends through more and more people, it may cause thanksgiving to increase to the glory of God. Therefore we do not give up. Even though our outer person is being destroyed, our inner person is being renewed day by day. For our momentary light affliction is producing for us an absolutely incomparable eternal weight of glory. So we do not focus on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

(2 Corinthians 4:5-18 CSB)

And,

"No one lights a lamp and puts it under a basket, but rather on a lampstand, and it give light for all who are in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father in heaven." 

(Matthew 5:15-16 CSB)

      I can't help thinking what I've been missing by not looking UP! 💗

A rainbow of rainbows on my ceiling!

                             

 "He must increase, but I must decrease"  (John 3:30)

♱