In Due Time

      

      Waiting just isn't fun! This has been a hard period of waiting for me. First, after the burst pipe, I had to wait for insurance appraisal, and I am STILL waiting for repairs to be done. The latter has been complicated by Covid. Though it seems like a month ago, Bill had what he thought was an allergy, UNTIL the fever started a week ago, and he tested positive for Covid. I bet most of you can relate, sadly. You feel bad in the first place, and then you have to wait 15 minutes for the darn test to give you results! So he waited and watched; I waited, apart, and prayed.

      I had been planning to meet repairmen at the lake, so here I was, exposed to Covid, and now in quarantine with two days' worth of food and clothes and vitamins; and of course my doctor didn't want me to go back home for more certain exposure. I cancelled the repairmen that morning while they were already headed my way. I texted my nearby friends to say "Don't come see me." Then I waited. And waited. And I'm still waiting, until Bill's fever subsides, then a week after that until I can go home. (Bless friends & family who've brought me food and left it at my door!)

      But I realized this morning that the time hasn't been wasted. Interestingly, I've been reading a book called Slow Brewing Tea, which describes a very anti-Christian man's thirty-year search for God. (Yes, I HIGHLY recommend it if you are looking for something provocative and deep with spiritual meaning.) With my often-foggy brain, along with the book's density of content, it has taken me nearly two months to finish, slowly brewing it, if you will, in my heart and mind. As I finished it yesterday, I was inspired to take up my Bible and begin reading it through, starting in Genesis. I've done this a few times before, but it's been a while. This morning I arrived at the story of Abram/Abraham and Sarai/Sarah. Talk about WAITING! At age 100 Abraham finally saw the birth of God's promised son to bless the nations. 

      Everyone acknowledges the fact that we've become a world of instant gratification. I grow impatient when I have to wait for my computer to boot up! But in this waiting period of illness and delays I am learning. Normally annoyed at being surrounded by messes, things out of place, I know there's no point in attacking the literal mess around me: books, pictures, bedclothes, and knick-knacks displaced by the flood can't be put back until their proper space has been repaired, painted, re-carpeted by the repairmen. But then I look forward to the blank canvas I'll have to carefully replace items which are necessary, good, beautiful, or simply sentimental. I can throw out the messy and unnecessary and create a new space of beauty and comfort! 

      Maybe that's what God is doing in our periods of powerlessness. This time of isolation I've been at peace, and I've felt His presence more than all the "busy" days. I've soaked myself in it, really, whether reading His Word, listening to beautiful hymns and praise songs, watching the birds and the ever-changing lake and sky, or simply resting in quietness with a vacant mind. I know that there's nothing I have to do or even can do to make myself more fit for His presence but empty myself and eagerly wait for my soul's Repairman to fill it "in due time."

"Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time."                  (1 Peter 5:6 NIV)

"He must increase and I must decrease."

John 3:30

 ✝️

"But God..."

      

     I couldn't even guess how many sermons I've heard in my seventy-five years, but how few I've remembered in any detail! Hopefully, many of them have been absorbed into my thinking and behavior, but there is one I will never forget, and perhaps it is for this very day. It was one of my son Christian's first, and it was entitled simply "But God." 

      I just did a search on both Bible Hub and Bible Gateway for the phrase and got results from 44 to 99, depending on the version of the Bible, so needless to say, it's a recurring theme in God's Word. Nearly each time, the phrase indicates a reversal of either events or someone's thinking from what we would consider a negative trend to a positive one. A familiar example is found in Genesis, when Joseph, who had been sold into slavery by his brothers yet had risen to the second most powerful position in Egypt, rescued his entire family from the famine in Israel. His response to his brothers' remorse when they recognized him in the house of Pharaoh was this:

"So now it was not you that sent me hither, but God: and he hath made me a father to Pharaoh, and lord of all his house, and a ruler throughout all the land of Egypt."  (Genesis 45:8 KJV, emphasis mine)

      This morning I arose from bed, as on most days with burning flesh and aching bones. I confess my attitude of late has been pretty negative. It seems I interact with fewer people as each year goes by; I laugh less, and smile rarely; I have little hope of ever having a "normal" life, or the active life I once had; I dream less and less of the places I'd like to go and things I'd like to do "someday." I quickly returned today to my recurrent gut-wrenching thought, "No one has any idea how it feels to be me, or understands how hard it is to keep going each day!"  Immediately and unbidden came that phrase "But God!" It came as if on a wisp of a cloud I could almost reach up and grasp with my hand, and my mind grabbed onto it like a lifeline and began to mull it over like a sip of sweet wine one wants to roll around on the tongue before swallowing. And I began to smile!

      It was as if all the peace I had been longing for for five and a half years came over me all at once! In the blink of an eye I understood that all the prayers I pray, whether for myself of someone else, I don't even need to put into words. All the agony that spills from my heart and body out my eyes-- He already knows! It has been written in His book since before time! How does He know how this flesh-life feels? He experienced it all during His brief time on earth as Yeshua, Son of Mary and the Holy Spirit, perfect God and perfect man, subject to all our pains and trials. Yet He was the Only One who didn't succumb to our human frailty and make the selfish choices we make that lead us away from our perfect Father God, because He WAS God! (See Matthew 26:63-64, Mark 14:61-62, John 4:25-26.) 

      He could have avoided it all, chosen to stay on His heavenly throne and leave us humans to our own pitiful devices, but ... being God... He didn't! He came to die, to walk with us, so we might live, not just brief, pain-filled days on earth, but forever with Him in His perfect, pain-free Heavenly home! 

“Don’t let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, and trust also in me. There is more than enough room in my Father’s home. If this were not so, would I have told you that I am going to prepare a place for you? When everything is ready, I will come and get you, so that you will always be with me where I am."  (John 14:1-3 NLT)

      I stop and marvel for a few moments at all the "But God" times in my life, times when things were going or could have gone very badly, but God, by His grace turned the bad into good. Today I was sad, but God turned my sadness to gladness. Today I was in pain, but God turned my pain to patience. Today I felt alone, but God comforted me. 

"For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime! Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning." (Psalm 30:5 NLT)

"He must increase and I must decrease."

John 3:30

 ✝️